Mother’s Law

 Proverbs 6:20-23 (NIV)

20 My son, keep your father’s command
   and do not forsake your mother’s teaching.
21 Bind them always on your heart;
   fasten them around your neck.
22 When you walk, they will guide you;
   when you sleep, they will watch over you;
   when you awake, they will speak to you.
23 For this command is a lamp,
   this teaching is a light,
and correction and instruction
   are the way to life,

I woke up this morning as usual anticipating a good day.  It is Sunday and Mother’s Day. I woke up in love and loved. Children happy, Charles Stanley in the background and the words of Eminem coming from downstairs. 

The pastors message of course centered on mothers. He entitled his sermon, Mother’s Law and he used the scripture above from Proverbs.  I had one of the many aha moments that I have when I am in church.  The scripture says to keep your fathers commands and mothers teaching and the difference in these 2 words describes the differences in how children respond to their father and to their mother.  Webster.com says that a command means to direct authoritatively (order) and to exercise a dominating influence over; whereas, teach means to cause to know something, to cause to know how and to accustom to some action or attitude.  The differences in these word symbolizes to me the differences in the roles of  fathers and mothers and explains why children react differently to what a mother tells them to do and what a father tells them to do. It explains why when dad says something he only has to say it once and the action immediately is stopped. When moms say something the action rarely if ever stops immediately. In my case my children each with their own personalities never stop in the same way. My oldest who is the comedian in the family is also considered the most laid back and non-reactionary generally gives me the thumbs up and says I got it mom. This never results in anything other than the movement of the thumb in the up direction. My middles son reacts as if I have interrupted him and he is clearly irritated. His response to my request is always followed by at least one of the following: I’m tired mom, why do I have to do it, huh, ooookkkkk, I’m in the bathroom, followed by a lot of  blowing and exhaling.  My daughter’s responses varies depending on what time it is. If I ask her to do something in the morning, she will say ok and go back to sleep, if I ask her around noon she says ok and continues to watch tv with her door closed, if it is in the afternoon she is tired and if it is in the evening she says in a minute mom.  As moms we teach our children everything from how to nurse to how to drive car and they require patience. Patience is indeed what it takes to be a mother. That is why we are the teachers scripturally and in the times in which we live.  

Your Words Project: Speaking on Purpose
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http://www.yolandebarial.wordpress.com/

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http://www.examiner.com/motherhood-in-stockton/yolande-barial

http://www.tracypress.com/view/full_story/11154526/article-Her-Voice–Children-are-a-parental-responsibility?

http://www.tracypress.com/view/full_story/12489710/article-Her-Voice–To-helmet-or-not-to-helment?instance=home_opinion_lead_story

http://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/tag/yolande-barial 

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Thank you Mom

The writer writes about what is important to him. I blog and wax poetic about the things that light my fire and as a way to make what I believe real.  Once a thought has been written on a paper it becomes reality.  Think about all of the reality shows and expose’s and documentaries and movies that we see daily.  Our minds are able to take the impossible action or the over-the-top action and make it believable.  That is the awesomeness of our thoughts. If we think it, even for a little while, it becomes real.  So, to that end we must be careful what we allow into our thoughts.  We often times can not stop the thought when it comes; however what we can do is to immediately recognize it as good for us or bad for us and when we make that connection we can “fix” it.  We can make it stay or we can make it go away.  Sometimes either or both of  those reactions are hard to do.  However, just like everything that we want it takes practice.  Practice doesn’t necessarily make things perfect; what it does for me, anyway, is to make things better and better. The more we practice the better we become. 
 
I have been writing since as long as I can remember.  My  mother raised me and my brothers and sister to be a little crazy, yes; however we were raised at a time when the term single mother didn’t exist.  What it was, was I guess you can say kinda normal.  My parents were married in name only. My mother raised us to be independent.  At the time we didn’t realize it, we were just doing what kids do.  We sometimes bucked her and thought she was crazy or slow or embarrassing; I admit sometimes still; however the woman did an amazing job.  She loves us unconditionally and  respectfully and disrespectfully, she is opinionated and pretty much always right.  This woman; strong, dark and chocolate has kept everything I have ever done as a little girl. Over the last 20 years she has begun to send me things.  She sent me my Brownie beanie when I was a 10-year-old, my pictures that I framed and decoupaged when I was 17, my fathers dog tags when he was in the Navy  and my  diaries from when I was a pre-teen to  about 17.  I have read my thoughts as a child and today my life has become the thoughts I had written.  When I read what I wrote as a child it is comical and thought-provoking and just down right silly.  The problems I had back then – cute. The belief in God has always been a part of the little Yolande then and now, it is what makes me the big Yolande. 
 
Thanks Mom for believing in me and in us when we didn’t even know that you were doing it.  By keeping those things that mattered to me when I didn’t know it and giving them to me when I know now what I know makes manifest my belief in your incredible ability to mother.  It is in this action that I see manifest true love and true care.  It is what I hope to become. A mother who believes that her children can do anything infuses into the child the belief that they really can do anything.  It is not so much the words that are said, it is the actions behind those words. A touch, a smile, a giggle, a grimace,  sucking air, an oh my God these kids are gonna kill me look – whatever the action – my mom had it all.  My brothers and sister and I knew then and  now  that she loves us.  And we love her.
 
 Please click on the link below.  This is my first article published for the Examiner which is an online newspaper. I am an official journalist and will be writing on this site and hopefully more jobs that pay will follow.  Thank you mom.